Relationships are very important to us as Travellers. Every relationship can be different. This includes our relationships with our families, friends and community. Having healthy and stable relationships overall means that we are more likely to live happier and less stressful lives. We are also more likely to feel like we belong and have good self- esteem and confidence. It is important to have a good relationship with your partner. Sometimes relationships can be difficult and stressful. Below are some things that might affect our relationships.

Different Travellers want different things from a relationship. It is important that we feel comfortable and safe in our relationship. We should feel that it is okay to have a different point of view to our partner and that no one is putting pressure on us to do anything we do not want to do.

• Having equal control over money
• Feeling respected and loved for who we are
• Feeling trusted and that we can trust each other
• Doing small things for each other that show that we care
• Listening to each other
• Making each other laugh
• Treating each other as equals

An unhealthy relationship is a relationship that is not good for us. Unhealthy relationships bring us sadness instead of bringing security and joy. A toxic relationship brings more sadness than happiness. Check out the below links for more information: HSE SpunOut

• Sometimes our stress or worry over health issues, poor accommodation, being homeless, money worries, or education worries can affect our relationship.
• Lack of time with each other, the pressures of raising children, violence or abuse, lack of trust, conflict, drug or alcohol misuse can all impact relationships.
• If we have been through a difficult time in our childhood like experiencing conflict, parents separating, parental relationship breakdown, trauma or lack of care, this can affect how we are in relationships or it can affect how our partner is in a relationship.
• It is important to talk about these kinds of issues with each other and to get outside help if you need it. Relationship and marriage counselling are available.

• Not feeling like equals
• Feeling angry a lot
• Feeling frustrated a lot
• Feeling criticised a lot
• Checking each other’s phone or social media account or phone is not shared
• Hurting each other in different ways – physically, emotionally, sexually or mentally
• Partner controlling who you can see or talk to
• Partner controlling money

• Tell your partner how you feel
• Be specific about your feelings “I feel upset because you didn’t listen to me”
• Listen to what each other has to say

Take time to get to know them. Chat and learn about each other’s personality. Ask them about their interests and learn about what you both have in common. There is no pressure on you to like the person you are chatting to.

Getting married is a big step. It is important that you take time to decide what you want for yourself and your own life. You should not make a decision about marriage because you think others will like it or approve of it. It is normal to have fears or worries about marriage. If you think that you do not want to go ahead with your marriage talk to your parents, siblings, aunts/uncles, or other Travellers you are good friends with.